While I do not wish that any of these things were different, I cannot help but try to read the real motivation behind them. I’ve come to the conclusion that it boils down to identity. Many of the careers that I have pursued have distinct identity associated with them. Police Officer, Pastor, Motorcycle mechanic, zoologist, doctor…all of them hold a distinct identity. So what does that say about me? It says I’m normal. It says that for the most part I’m not sure who I really am. A lot of the deep introspection that I’ve been doing lately has revealed that I’m just a dude who loves God, loves my family (and therefore want to care for them well), and loves people. I’m pretty sure I have said it many times before, but basically that is who I am and at the end of the day that is who I want to be known and remembered for. Sure, there are a lot of things that I want to accomplish in this life. Lots of dreams in my heart and mind, but those are really secondary until they become primary in their own time.

What about you? Do you struggle with identity? Are you okay with who you are, or are you like me and waste substantial time and energy trying to be someone else? How can we encourage each other in this journey?

I’m just a fellow sojourner…praying for your journey!

I’m not really trying to bash anyone’s political candidate, even though I am a little cheeky today.  I’m kinda bashing the people that think they need to ‘raise awareness’ of Barack Obama.

[There is a video that cannot be displayed in this feed. Visit the blog entry to see the video.]

Thanks to Travis for posting this up.

Let’s have an example, shall we?  My parents were divorced pretty soon after my arrival to earth.  My mom had her share of ups and downs in life, but she worked hard to ensure that we were taken care of.  Most of the time when I was growing up she had many jobs just so we could squeak by.  During my school-age years, I was a latch-key kid, meaning that I was home alone a lot.  I was fine, don’t get me wrong, but that fact lends itself to the story.  So here I was, a kid of a single mom who was pretty much left to his own devices because his mom HAD to work a lot.  To put it another way, I was a poor white kid without a dad at home.  All these factors lead a person in my family to predict that I would basically amount to nothing in life, that I would be dead or in jail by the time I was eighteen.  The funny thing is that not only was he in jail many times by the time I was eighteen, but his son, who is the same age as I am, has found himself comfortable in and out of the judicial system.  So what made the difference in my life?  What didn’t my family member count on?  He had no idea that I would become a follower of Jesus.  I often say that I became a worse person after I met Jesus, but truth of the matter is that I only became aware of the things that I did that were wrong after I became a Jesus Follower.

So what does all this have to do with living a unique life?  Personally, I could keep hearing the words of my family members who would have me fail at life.  I could let the words of the kids on the playground calling me names ring in my ears.  I could allow those thoughts hinder me from living this abundant life.  But I won’t.  I wish I could say that I don’t think about these people who are only out to bring me down, but I can’t.  I can control how this effects me, however.  Are there people who have spoken negatively into your life?  There is something about humanity that drives us to make fun of/speak negatively of that which we don’t understand or that which we fear.  I’m guessing that my uncle saw something in me that he feared.  He feared that I would live a life that is unique and that I would somehow live a life that mattered.  I’m pretty sure that he feels that his life doesn’t matter.  I wouldn’t say that his life doesn’t matter, but I will say that the things that he chooses to do with his life are negatively impacting his ability to live a life that does make a difference for humanity.  (If for some odd reason you’re reading this, get in touch with me.  I’ll buy you a beer and we can talk. Seriously.)

Back to the sermons.  In the one that I have listened to several times now, Erwin tells a story about he and some of his friends making a short film.  One of the stunts that he did required him to be thrown through a glass window.  Not Hollywood glass, but glass glass.  The only problem was that he wasn’t actually thrown through the window, he had to jump through the window.  That takes considerably more effort and determination than being thrown by someone else.  The good news in this situation was that there were pyrotechnics rigged to the glass so that the exact moment that Erwin was going through the glass, the glass would shatter and he could land safely on the other side.  But, he still had to throw himself at the window.  He mentioned that much of the time we expect that God will orchestrate our stunts, so to speak.  Many of us stand by waiting on God to make it all happen.  And we keep waiting.  And waiting.  And waiting.  You get the point.  Erwin then said that there are portions of this unique life that we have to do for ourselves.  We don’t like to hear that we have to throw ourselves at the glass window.  We don’t like not knowing if the pyrotechnics will actually work and we can land safely on the other side.  I was telling my wife about this idea and her response was simply, “I don’t like it.”  She has way more faith than I could ever muster and teaches me more about God every day than in 7 years of Bible College, but when it comes to the more ‘mystical’ and experiential side of this journey of faith and life, she isn’t sure what to think.  Funny, she is an artsy type who should get this.  She is also a very literal thinker.

Throwing yourself through the glass window with your eyes wide shut.  You want to do it.  I want to do it.  But, it is much easier to be thrown.  God sometimes needs to discover that we will in fact throw ourselves through the window.  We are at that point in our lives where He is seeing what we will do.  I’m becoming more confident that he will ignite the charges at the exact time that we jump through the window.  It is awesome and it sucks all at once.  But it is coming together.  We are destined to live a unique life.  You are destined to live a unique life.  What glass windows do you need to jump through?

Let me start out by saying that I am pro-life. I am pro ALL life.  I think God values life otherwise he wouldn’t have created it.   The problem I have is that seemingly, the single most important issue is abortion.  I honestly can’t speak for anyone but myself, but if all we are concerned about is if a woman can legally terminate her pregnancy, we are seriously missing the point of this life.  Why don’t we take a proactive role in creating places for women who find themselves in situations where they need to make these choices where they feel safe and welcomed?  I know there are resources like this, but instead of picketing Planned Parenthood, why don’t we/they/you/I help inform these women?

I implore you, dear uninformed voters of America, to inform yourselves so that your only voting issues are abortion and taxes.  Also, please stop voting for someone just because they claim an evangelical standpoint.  I’m all for having Christ follower lead this nation, don’t get me wrong.  I am against blindly voting for someone simply because of their affiliation with some evangelical position.  Take a look at their character. Take a look at their voting record.   It really is time to stop being sheep, think for yourself, and honesty vote for the lesser of all evils.  No one is perfect, everyone will go back on their word at some point.  Follow your gut and instinct and vote for who you think will be the best person to lead this nation in a new age.

/rant

One of the things that is always thrown around by the Christian Right is that this nation is a Christian nation. I guess the rebel in me always always wanted to not admit that..I used to have a line that I would say when someone would go off about how the United States is a Christian Nation, but I can’t for the life of me remember what it was. Jeepers, getting old. Anyway…After reading the portion of the book that I have, I have to confess that I now agree, at least in part, with the idea that this is a Christian nation. The other part is based on Jewish Law, particularly the Ten Commandments, and also Natural Law. Strictly speaking, I would venture that the Ten Commandments are one of the only things in this country that are, in fact, Constitutional. So put them back up!

I’m excited to read the rest of the book, it really puts perspective on the nation as it is today and also on the nation as it was intended to be by the founding fathers. Go check it out for yourself if you, like me, are quite under knowledged (that isn’t a word, I just made it up) in matters of the Constitution.

Other stuff I’m reading:
Dreams From My Fathers by Barak Obama
The Cat Who Brought Down the House
The Ultimate Guide to Adwords

Honestly, I know Chris well. He is a solid God-fearing and Christ-loving man. He would give you the shirt off of his back and a bottle of water or ten. He loves other people more than he loves himself and takes every opportunity to show them that. But he is a serious guy (kinda strange since he used to be a comedian). He is serious about God. He is serious about His Word. He is serious about seeing everyone in Polk County, Florida come into a saving relationship with Jesus Christ and will let nothing stand in the way of that. That is why he comes across as ‘I don’t have time for this crap’. He doesn’t have time for it. The flock that he leads really is his first priority and love. I’m not really trying to defend Chris here. He doesn’t need me. He has a congregation behind him. I’ve met some of them. Polk County borders some pretty serious redneck areas and Chris has been a chaplain to a number of prisoners. (Also, I think the Russian Mafia is pretty active in Central Florida…don’t ask why I know that) He is covered.

Anyway….go read his posts. I’m sure that these two posts will break both his email inbox and his server. What they don’t know is that Chris probably never will see any of the hate mail. Chris, PREACH!

I’m calling you out, western United States!

Utah: Although this site deals mainly with things related to Christianity and not Mormonism, you should at least stop in once in awhile. Trinity Jordan of Elevation Church, where you at?

Wyoming: Oh give me a home, where the buffalo roam, and the deer and the antelope play….Dave Freudenthal, Wyoming Governor, why no love?

Montana: Another of the great western states. I realize that you people are busy elk hunting and fly fishing, but it is pretty much winter now. Log on, surf on over! Chris Cunningham, I know you’re a busy man, but you’re at least 1/4 Minnesotan. Show some support, brother!

Maryland: This one is really strange. I’m guessing that Kyle Boller has other things on his mind than coming here, but at least my boy D-Plum could stop by at least once!

That is it ladies and gentlemen. There are only four states in the union where I don’t have visitors. Perhaps Kyle Boller can change that! I actually thought it would be an interesting experiment to see if I can get all 50 states in one month. I think that it is possible! In case Dave Freudenthal cannot stop by, maybe you know someone in Wyoming?

I’m doing some crazy things right now. We are moving full speed ahead with our future plans, at least with the ones that we are able to move forward with. I’m working on some business ventures, mostly online. I’m going all out to not have to have a traditional job when we move. It is going really well..I’m learning a ton that can help with some of the stuff that God is calling us to do. Sorry I’ve been spotty with the postings. Truthfully, it is pretty quiet here in my world. Lots of things going on, but I’ve been spending time writing other places and learning other things that really don’t fit on this site.

I hope and pray that you are all well!